This is actually the story of two loves. It was love at first sight when I met my wife-to-be. However, my FIRST LOVE courted me from the very beginning but I didn't acknowledge my FIRST LOVE (Revelation 2:4) until 1984 when I finally met the lover of my soul - my Lord Jesus Christ!!!
MY HUMBLE BEGINNINGS
I was born in San Francisco on June 30, 1951, and as an only child I was just a baby when we moved to Vallejo, California, where I grew up. I was sickly as a baby with severe eczema which affected most of my skin. My parents placed mittens on my hands to prevent me from scratching. Consequently, I never went through a crawling stage because of my skin condition. My loving parents smothered me with overprotection.
I went to Grant School up until about the fourth grade when my parents decided to send me to Saint Vincent’s, a Catholic School (this was years before St. Patick's was built). Although my father was not a churchgoer and was critical of organized religion, he decided that a private school was a good way to instill manners and discipline for his son. Being a devout Roman Catholic (http://www.reachingcatholics.org/archive.html), my mother was happy with his decision. I was forced to leave all my friends at public school 
and was thrown into a strange environment. There was one other Filipino and no other minorities in my class when I first arrived. I was the second shortest person in our class (the shortest was a girl) and I was very skinny and sickly (I was asthmatic) and I became introverted and withdrawn. Oddly enough, my height did not concern me as much as the fact that I was very skinny. The bullies at school usually targeted a few kids who were actually easier to pick, but eventually would get around to me. As a result I became angry, bitter and antisocial. 
When I was going to Saint Vincent’s the Roman Catholic mass was still recited in Latin and the altar was facing the opposite direction. All the singing was liturgical hymns. It wasn't until my high school years that folk songs were introduced. It was during this period that I also became an altar boy and also received Confirmation.
THE HIGH SCHOOL YEARS
When I reached high school I only had two close friends. In the ninth grade I was about 4’11” tall and weighed around 74 lbs. Although I was still small and skinny I was determined not to be picked on. I projected an image that if I was picked on and beat up, you would at least know that you had been in a fight. I had a chip on my shoulder, but people stopped picking on me and left me alone. I had a lot of aggression in me.
While in elementary school we had Dominican nuns for teachers (some were noted for slapping your hands with rulers if you were bad), but high school was different because we had both male and female lay teachers. We had religion classes every day and although we had Bibles (http://www.clarifyingchristianity.com/b_proof.shtml) I personally don’t remember opening one. It was around my sophomore year that I began to have doubts about religion and whether God actually existed. 
“There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death” (Proverbs 14:12, NIV).
One of my friends in religion class would argue with the teacher for the sake of argument. Although my friend believed in God, he would ask questions just to get under our religion teacher's skin. What amazed me was that this teacher could not answer many basic questions regarding life. These moments planted the seed of doubt in me.
I began to wonder why I should listen to a teacher who couldn't even teach me. I started to think that everything I had learned about God and life was all a sham. By the time I graduated from Saint Vincent’s in 1969, I gradually became an agnostic (although I would tell everyone I was an atheist).
“The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.” (Psalm 14:1, KJV).
I was a little more rebellious during my last two years of high school. I started cutting classes but was never caught because I would submit a slip to one of the student volunteers working in the office with a forged signature of my dad. It was never questioned because my absence would be regarding having an asthma attack and I had had a history of asthma problems.
As I started to doubt God’s existence, the theory of evolution (http://www.clarifyingchristianity.com/creation.shtml) seemed to make more sense to me. I never studied it in depth, but I automatically assumed that if scientists believed it, then it must necessarily be true.
I hated school, but my junior and senior years were more pleasant since I had more freedom as far as getting around. Our little school did not have Drivers ED and my father considered it a waste to time to send me outside for Driver's Training since he had already taught me how to drive. My last two years of high school I drove around with only a permit, but my dad didn't realize I drove around in his car (a '64 Chevy, Impala) a lot without a driver's license. The fact that I could now hang around the "brothers" from Vallejo High School made my high school years more bearable. My classmates just didn't understand me since I was into soul music and not "white" music. Whenever a classmate made me angry I would call them a honkey. When I was with my public school buddies outside of school we were off into James Brown, Santana, Otis Redding, Wilson Picket, etc. We called ourselves the Sly, The Slick, The Wicked and the Wanton. One of my friends had his own car and every now and then we would go to San Francisco on the weekends and try to sneak in the topless clubs in North Beach at night. Most of the times they would throw us out because of our ages, but not before we were able to sneak a peak. Yes, I was able to take a glance at the famous Carol Doda.
During my senior year I was working as a busboy at a Chinese Restaurant and had a crush on one of the waitresses, who was divorced and was close to ten years older than me. In order to impress her I became motivated to build myself up physically. I started getting involved in bodybuilding (I gained 30lbs. in 30 days with Joe Weider's Weight Gain powder) and I also joined a friend and we drove all the way to Fairfield to take KAJUKENBO, Emperado Method under sifu Tony Ramos. This style was founded by Adriano Emperado, a Filipino who lived in Hawaii. It is a combination of karate, jui jitsu, kenpo and mau sing bo (Chinese boxing, gung fu and kung fu). One of the assistant instructors in the class I took was Phil Cornin, who beat black belt Chuck Norris when he (Phil) was only a brown belt. Phil Cornin eventually became involved with full contact karate but never made it to the top.
Although I had built myself up physically, I was disappointed that the waitress I had a crush on told me that I was too young and I made her look too old. I didn’t stay in Kajukenbo too long because I couldn’t afford it, but I was already hooked on bodybuilding. There was about a five year period where my asthma totally disappeared. What little money I made was spent on buying supplements and I would pop about 40 pills a day – everything from B-complex to dessicated calves liver. Other than prescription for prednisone (for asthma), I have NEVER taken steriods and it never even crossed my mind. I tried different bodybuilding techniques (supersets, tri-sets, circuit training, etc.) and would work out five or six days a week. I even did split routines where I would workout in the morning and finish up in the evening. Although I always hated running, I forced myself to run five or six miles at least four times a week and I would also punch the heavy bag that I hung in a friend's back yard. 
Man, I thought of myself as cool.
VENTURING OUT
My father retired from Mare Island Naval Shipyard after 26 yrs. Just before he retired, he had my mother move to the Philippines to build his dream retirement home. My father became an American citizen when he joined the army during World War II, so he could not buy land in the Philippines. However, my mom never became an American citizen, though she had lived here over fifty years. It was always my dad’s plan to retire and go back to his beloved homeland and my parents mutually agreed that my mom would not become a citizen in this country so that she could buy property in the Philippines.
By the time my dad retired, his dream house was already completed. He couldn’t wait to go home and be with my mother. Unfortunately, my father did not anticipate that I would stay in the U.S. His retirement plan included my going back with him. I’m sure that as an only child, I disappointed him in so many ways. He wanted me to finish college and he also hoped that I would go to the Philippines and live there. When I told him I wanted to stay here because this is where I was born I know that it must have hurt his feelings. So when my father left, I was on my own. I considered myself self-sufficient and since I did not believe in God (http://www.carm.org/atheism.htm) I needed to depend on myself alone.
As an atheist one of the problems I had was that I was not self-motivated to make something of myself. Other than to simply exist, I had no incentive to make anything of myself. My thinking was that you live and you die and that’s it. What was the point in striving for anything if it’s all going to end anyway. I just lived for the moment. The Vietnam War was still going on and I went to Solano Community College just to get an S1 deferment. I had no intention of being a draft dodger, but my thought was that if they wanted me they would have to come and get me. When they had the draft lottery they missed my number by one. What I didn’t know at the time is that being an only child I was not obligated to join.
I eventually withdrew (I would have failed anyway) from college because I was wasting my time. My dilemma was what to do with my life as a college dropout. I had no problems with doing manual labor since my father would use his vacation time from Mare Island to take me to work out in the fields with him. I had been doing that since the fifth grade picking pears, peaches, walnuts, grapes, etc. He would take me anywhere from Suisun City all the way to Stockton just to work the fields. I don't regret those times because it has made me thankful for the job that I have now.
I knew that I could survive by working in the fields, but there were no fields in Vallejo. That’s when I decided to come to Stockton and in 1973 I moved in with relatives in Stockton, California and made new friends and worked various jobs from sorting tomatoes in the fields, boxing tubs and showers for American Standard, loading trucks at Diamond Walnut, custodial work with SUSD and security guard with American Protective Services. When I was a stevadore at Diamond Walnut we would work twelve hours and I would go home and work out for three hours (ah, the energy and vitality of youth). I had one partner, a black brother, who was also a bodybuilder. After we finished loading a truck he would do chinups and I would do pushups while our co-workers looked at us like we were crazy.
Besides working out with weights, I would also hang around with people in the martial arts just to have someone to spar with and also learn different techniques. I also took Filipino escrima (Cabales serrada method) for a few years under Stan Wells, a student of the late Angel Cabales, who was the grandmaster of this particular style. It would be many years later that I encouraged and got my daughter Taysia to take it under Vincent Cabales, the son of Angel and the present grandmaster of serrada.
THE BIG CHANGE
1978 was the big turning point in my life when I took a vacation to the Philippines to visit my parents. My dad had retired from Mare Island Naval Shipyard in Vallejo years earlier and he moved to Tagbilaran City, Bohol, Philippines. It was during this trip that I met my future wife, Thelma Garay, 
who was a medical secretary student at Southwestern University in Cebu. She had been a beauty contestant at SU and she was one of eight sisters and four brothers. The reason we met was because my parents took me to Cebu to look for protein powder since there was none in Tagbilaran. Thelma's mother happened to be on the same ship we were traveling on. I was seated in the middle and my father and future mother-in-law struck up a conversation. Less than a week later, Thelma accompanied her mother to visit the home of my parents in Tagbilaran. We were introduced and I instantly fell in love with her. After knowing each other less than a month we were married in Pangangan, Calape, Bohol, Philippines on March 12, 1978.
Because of pride, I almost didn't get married because it would mean I would have to compromise my atheism with what I considered religious ignorance. Because of past experiences in dealing with people, I considered all people who were "religious" to be intellectual midgets. Christians were at the top of my list. I eventually consented to get married under Catholic rituals just to respect my future wife, her family and mine. I already had a bad first impression of Father Pusta, the priest that performed the marriage. When we were first introduced I extended a hand of friendship but instead of giving me a handshake he just looked at me and refused to shake my hand. This only reinforced my distaste for "Christians" and religion. “This people draweth nigh unto me with their mouth, and honoureth me with their lips; but their heart is far from me. But in vain they do worship me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men” (Matthew 15:8-9, KJV). I wanted to rip this guy's head off, but I didn't want to disrespect the family around me.
Ironically, a couple of years later after my daughter was born, my wife had to pull me away from a priest at Presentation Church because he refused to baptize my daughter when he found out I was an atheist. I was angry and ready to punch his lights out because I did not understand what my beliefs had to do with my daughter - after all my wife was Catholic. I only consented to have my daughter baptized because of my wife. I personally didn't care one way or the other. We eventually had her baptized at St. Luke's. She is the only one of all of my children that was baptized as a baby.
I look back in retrospect and I praise God for His amazing grace in keeping me safe during all those years I was filled with anger and bitterness towards life and people in general. I was very antisocial.
Getting back to my marriage, when it came time to go into the confessional I hated myself for compromising my principles and consenting to go to confession. I had to talk myself into it. I still remember the ritual prayers and I hesitatingly said, "Bless me Father for I have sinned, it has been fifteen years since my last confession. These are my sins..." There was a long silence and finally the priest impatiently asked me what my sins were. I looked at him defiantly and told him, "I have no sins." He looked at me surprised and after getting his composure he told me to say something like 10 Hail Marys and 10 Our Fathers. Of course, I'm thinking to myself, this guy's crazy if he thinks I'm going to do what he says. If you're reading this, you need to understand that there is no such thing as "sin" to an atheist or an agnostic. Without a God there is no absolute truth. Truth is relative and man can change his values at his discretion.
My wife and I spent our honeymoon in Cebu, but it was cut short when I became deathly ill and we went back to Bohol. It turns out I had amoebic dysentery from drinking the water. I spent five days of my honeymoon in the hospital in Tagbilaran, Bohol. After recovery I returned back to the U.S. and Thelma followed several months later after I petitioned her.
After only a few weeks in America, my wife found work immediately at the old Zody’s store on Hammer Lane (it's no longer there) and also as a nurses aide in one of the convalescent hospitals. I was still working as a custodian with SUSD and also worked with American Protective Services (which no longer exists) on the weekends as a security guard. I was working seven days a week.
My wife and I had four children (Taysia, Justys, Javlin and Jaycee) by 1983. Our youngest was born December 2, 1983 and on February 29, 1984, my wife had a stroke due to a brain aneurysm. They found a cyst in her brain the size of a walnut and she hemorrhaged. At one point the neurosurgeon, Dr. Karl Gregorious, said there was nothing else that medical technology could do for her. If her condition did not change within the next three hours she would either die or become a vegetable. According to him, it was all in God’s hands. Unfortunately, I did not believe in any kind of supernatural being, so this offered me no comfort.
THE BORN AGAIN EXPERIENCE
As I look back in retrospect, there were a series of events (too many to mention) orchestrated by God’s mighty hand to open up my eyes. Because of space limitations, to make a long story short, I gave my life to Jesus when a Mexican minister, Robert Rodriguez, led me to the Lord around 2 A.M in the Conference Room at St. Joseph’s Hospital. I became a brand new creation in Christ and my life was transformed.
“Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I obey your word” (Psalm 119:67, NIV).
The born again experience is like no other. Although my wife was still dying in the hospital, I experienced the peace of God in my heart and I knew that no matter what happened, He would be there with me. It's impossible to describe to someone who has never been born again. It's like trying to describe the taste of a certain food to someone who has never tasted it. That person has to taste it to experience it on a personal level.
WAS BLIND BUT NOW I SEE
It was then that I realized that Christianity is not about a religion, but a relationship with a living Savior who loves me. My church, my pastor, my denomination did not save me. It was Jesus Christ!!! “And they sung a new song, saying, Thou art worthy to take the book, and to open the seals thereof: for thou wast slain, and hast redeemed us to God by thy blood out of every kindred, and tongue, and people, and nation; And hast made us unto our God kings and priests: and we shall reign on the earth” (Revelation 5:9-10, KJV).
My wife and I have now been married 28 yrs. and our two oldest children have just graduated from college – all because of God’s loving mercy and divine grace. As the result of the stroke in 1984, my wife has partial paralysis in her right arm and she has aphasia, which is a speech impediment. However, we are actually happier now than before the stroke. To the cynic, I would respond by saying that my faith is not based in God’s miracles, but on what Jesus did on the cross for us.
Unlike my oldest son, I have never attended a Bible college; however, by God’s grace He has allowed me to become a licensed minister, teach weekly Bible studies and become a volunteer with Match Two Prisoner Outreach. “But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty” (1 Corinthians 1:27, KJV). It’s not by might, certainly not by my abilities, but it’s in His sufficiency by His Spirit that I can do these things in Jesus Christ.
For anyone going through trials in their lives, I offer the following verses:
“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort that we ourselves have received from God” ( 2 Corinthians 1:3-4, NIV).
“Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope” (Romans 5:3, NIV).
God bless you all.
Family Update:
My wife and I presently attend Bethany Christian Center in Stockton. Our senior pastor is Rev. Ben Refuerzo, whom I admire and respect tremendously.
I praise God that my co-worker, Ptr. Bernie Dela Cruz, invited me to come to Bethany Temple, our old church building years ago. It was under then senior pastor, Tony De La Torre that I grew in the Lord. Despite my feelings of inadequacy, Ptr. Tony saw potential in me and I credit him with being instrumental in my Christian growth. At his urging, I eventually became a licensed minister with the International Assemblies of the Firstborn, Inc. (http://iafb.org/) .
In the Old Testament God used a donkey to speak. We lack faith when we allow our inadequacies and insecurities as an excuse to prevent us from being used. I have never gone to Bible College but God still uses my availability (not ability) to teach Bible studies on Tuesday evenings.
I used to do one-on-one mentoring at Dewitt Nelson at California Youth Authority (now called CDCR for California Department of Corrections - Juvenile Justice Division), through Match-Two Prisoner Outreach Ministry. In fact, the first kid I mentored , Bro. "T" Bunmiend, won an Outstanding Achievement Award given by the California Probation, Parole and Correctional Association. My wife and I proudly watched him accept this award at Lake Tahoe in 2005. T was 14 years old and in 9th grade when he became involved with a street gang in Los Angeles. Traveling to the Stockton-Modesto area for a New Years Eve Party, he and some of his LA friends were witness to a gang fight in which someone died. Failing to report the crime, "T" was arrested and eventually charged as a fight participant. He then spent over six years in juvenile correctional facilities until he was paroled in 2001. In 2004, an honorable discharge led to a superior court judge ordering that the case against him "is hereby set aside and the accusation or information is dismissed.
While at CYA he graduated class valedictorian and since being paroled in 2001 he as been accepted at USC. He is currently going to USC, majoring in Biology and Education. He is a a full time student and also working as a research assistant at a microbiology lab on the campus part time. He is also in the education program at USC, which will ceritify him as a credentialed teacher in Biology when he graduates in 2009. He is also an intern at the Los Angeles County hospital and is preparing to student teach at a local high school this following fall semester. He is truly a life that has been changed by the power of God.
Now, God has led me to a different type of ministry with M-2 trying to conduct Bible studies at Chad at Pajaro Hall, which houses the most violent juvenile offenders in California. Crips, Bloods, Nortenos and Surenos are housed at this facility. I pray that God will use me to impact some lives.
Our oldest child, Taysia, graduated from nursing at Delta College and is presently working in ER at one of the local hospitals. She has just been promoted to relief charge nurse.
Our oldest son, Justys, graduated from Bethany Bible College in Scotts Valley just two weeks before my daughter, earning his Bachelors in Church Leadership. He attended Regents College in Vancouver, Canada for only a semester and became homesick for California. He is presently lives in Cupertino, California and is working as a teacher at a Crossroads Christian school in Menlo Park. He is also going to Fuller Theological Seminary and plans to earn his Masters of Divinity.
UPDATE: Justys is presently living in Springfield, Missouri where he is working as a custodian to earn money while he goes for his masters degree in theology. The headquarters for the Assembly of God is in Springfield.
Our middle son, Javlin, is presently commuting to Sacramento where he attends UTI to be an auto technician. He and Nancy Palacio were married on April 30th, 2005 and they now have two beautiful children - my grandaughters Naliyah and Navaeh.
Our youngest, Jaycee, is presently attending Delta College. He is also working full time at one of the local hospitals. He also has is own weblog at www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=wadijusay .
Now that I'm turning 57 yrs. of age, I'm reminded of my own mortality after having seen so many people pass away. All the years of repetitive motions and heavy lifting at work have taken its toll and I have a bad back and experience joint pains in my wrists and shoulder. I quit lifting weights around age 49, and my workout is limited to doing about ten minutes on the Total Gym, three or four times a week. Obviously, fitness is no longer my priority, rather it's my spiritual development that I'm more concerned with. "Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal"
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